ranuel (ranuel) wrote,

In a dreadful state of knowing and not knowing

Actually the title sort of applies to something else in my life right now too but I'll cover that in a different post later.

I'm pretty sure one of my neighbors died this morning and I heard the whole thing but I don't know who or if it was my neighbor.

A little after 7 a truck goes whizzing past. Cars go whizzing past all the time. The posted 45mph is a little fast for a residential area with blind driveways, S curves and even a couple of 90 degree curves even if it IS rural and people tend to take it as a general suggestion anyway.  We tend towards at least one serious accident a year, and I can point to 4 places within a longish walk from my place where people have died. This truck wasn't going lightspeed, just 45 - 50.

A second after I heard it go past I heard a thunk and knew it had hit something. I immediately heard a keening noise like something in a lot of pain and assumed it was a dog. I pulled on a robe and grabbed my phone and started to go out. As the noise continued I had an awful feeling that I might have to shoot a dog to put it out of it's misery if someone else didn't go but then I heard a man's voice and stopped to listen a minute and see if I were needed. The keening resolved into a woman screaming hysterically about her dog, Fifi. Well, it was a dog then but the owners were dealing with it. I felt sorry for them, I've been them, sent up a short prayer for them and their dog and went inside.

About 10 minutes later there are emergency lights everywhere.

I can't see much of the road from inside my house and even on the front steps the woods hide anything not directly in front but when I look out there's a cop parked in the road just past one end of my driveway blocking traffic. I pulled on some actual clothes and walked down to the road and there was an ambulance, a firetruck, and at least one other cop car parked in front of my property with lights going. A pickup was in the ditch and there were people sitting on the tailgate and a man with a little dog (Fifi?) on a leash standing by. I had a thought that maybe the screaming woman had a heart attack. If it's who I think it is she's in her early sixties, if it's her mother who lives next door then it would be early 80s so it's possible.

I didn't have a chance to ask the young cop standing gaurd before she turned around and sharply told me there'd been an accident and turned around in a manner designed to discourage any questions. She also gave me a look of contempt.

I am still pissed off about that. They are on my land (I own the lots on both sides of the road where it happened and several vehicles are pulled over on the grass). It is probably someone I know, although I haven't really spoken much to either of the possible victims in the last 25 years. We aren't a very social neighborhood but we keep vague tabs on one another. I am not some rubbernecking thrill seeker wanting to view some blood and guts thank you very much.

I couldn't see anything for all the big vehicles and flashing lights so I went inside and pulled up the traffic website that tracks all active accidents in the area and saw the worst. "Roadblock. Fatality".

They just now cleared out and I saw a wrecker go by with the truck on it  even though it only has minor fender damage.

2+2= They hit her while she was out walking her dog. Her screaming about her dog and if it were okay were probably her last words. They impounded the truck.

OR it could be that they skided off the road and someone fell off the back of the truck and it's no one I know.

Most of the people who live on this streach of the road are related to each other in some way so if it were a neighbor then all that went on where people who loved her could hear it. Either way the driver of the truck must be suffering hell right now. I'm feeling sick and shakey but someone's world has crashed down on them.

So, I know there's been a tragedy on my property but not the details, not that I want details but I would like to know who died. Saying a prayer for the unknown woman and her family either way.
Tags: real life
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